Fat pig failure

I can't stand to be myself.

I did so well yesterday, I was past hungry. I had used up more calories than I'd taken in, and I'd only taken in about 80 cals, and ate two small pieces of chicken, and all the lettuce I could stomach. By the end of the night I was so past hungry lines were blurring and I was shaking.
It was wonderful.

But then today I wasn't sure I wanted to pass out because I would be around so many people. So I ate....and couldn't stop.
Thank god everything I ate was vegetarian and mostly starches. I didn't finish all of the food but I ate. I had a diet coke. Then I came home and ate candy. Then noodles.
It's sad because I could have stopped. I could've gone down the the gym and worked out all of that nasty food. But I didn't.
I was lazy and fat.
I need to loose another 20 lbs, and I don't want to wait 2 months this time! I know that if I don't eat I will loose weight.